Welcome To Stalin Island

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Getting Time Cheetah out two pages at a time is very exciting and slightly vexing.

Exciting = you all get to see something that me, my brother, Matt, and Mike have been working on for quite some time, and you’ll get new Time Cheetah week in and week out for a while yet.

Slightly Vexing = We wrote this story more than a year ago and it’s all drawn, too! Knowing everything that happens in it, we just want you to be able to read the whole thing, like, RIGHT NOW!

This week marks a true turning point, when the scales come down firmly on the exciting side: Time Cheetah arrives on Stalin Island! From here on out, things keep getting (hopefully) funnier and (definitely) weirder; if you’ve just been dipping your toe and checking out a page here and there, this is the week where I would suggest diving in. It’s about time you find out why Time Cheetah is known as the hottest new webcomic on the internet! (it’s true [probably, if we keep saying it])

And a reminder: like us on Facebook, follow Time Cheetah on Twitter and Tumblr, and share the website with your co-workers and loved ones! Hope you enjoy the gorgeous art on today’s page, and get ready for a fun twist to the story on Thursday!

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License to Drive

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You can tell a lot about a country by how easy it is to get a Driver's License. 

Thanks to my time in Japan and now work with Turista Libre (Rad Tijuana Tours, woo!) I've met people from all over. Bitching about traffic is a great cultural unifier, but in those same conversations I learned what they had to go through to be able to sit in driver's seat and bitch about said traffic. A few highlights:

- Japan: I once saw a friend studying what can only be described as a map of the hardest Mario Kart level I had ever seen. When I asked what it was for, he said it was the practice track for the driver's exam. It was his third try.

- Germany: You legally have to take several classes, each costing a tidy sum, before being allowed to take the test, which costs an insulting sum. Driving in Germany requires a monetary investment akin to starting a small business.

- Mexico: I drove around the block. 

Really makes you think about how special each country in this world is. You know what else is special? The new Time Cheetah page. Check it out!

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NUMBERS ON THE BOARD

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Played some fun board games over the weekend, which reminded how much I used to love board games as a kid. So, figured I'd take today's post to rank, in arbitrary order, my favorite childhood board games:

Monopoly – Every child needs to play this, it teaches so many valuable life lessons: winners gloat like assholes, losers have to stick around until it's over, and the uncaring capitalistic system will only punish you for your careless deeds.

Candyland – It's candy. There's a land of it. Whaddaya need, a road map?

Operation – I've heard this actually gets you some Pre-Med credits in a couple of schools. Seriously.

RISK – War reduced the whims of an untrained commander and the roll of a die. Sounds about right.

Battleship – War reduced to “YOU BASTARD, YOU LOOKED AT MY BOARD WHILE I WAS IN THE BATHROOM, DIDN'T YOU?!”

Connect Four – I'll be honest, I never finished a single game since I would release all the pieces just before my brother beat me at it. After the third time, he caught on to my winning strategy.

Sorry – Love means never having to say you're sorry, ya dingus!

Crossfire – Ha! You fool, nobody owned Crossfire! But now the song is stuck in your head!

Hey! Did you read today's Time Cheetah page yet? Go check it, people argue and Cheetah gets all sulky about it. Enjoy!

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Taco Translation

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Translation is hard and dumb at the same time.

I've spent my whole life growing up with two languages, Spanish and English, in two cities, San Diego and Tijuana, that often seem undecided as to which one they want to use more. I can switch between the two mid-sentence, blend regional pronunciations for both, and decipher the nuance of slang in either one. But it took my whole life to get to this point.

Translation is hard.

Today, I had Tacos Varios for lunch. I'm sure even those well versed in Mexican Cuisine will be confused, Tacos what-now? Tacos Varios are incredibly common in Mexico, but non-existent in the USA. They're tacos filled with the ingredients from a stew. Most places have many stews to choose from, hence the name, Tacos Varios.

What does Tacos Varios translate to in English? Various Tacos.

You go to a Various Tacos cart to have various types of tacos.

Translation is dumb. 

Tacos were pretty good thought. You know what else is good? This New Time Cheetah Page. CHECK IT OUT!

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